Dating a black transexual woman
These are men who find me attractive, but are initially hesitant because of my trans-ness.With these men, I went on dates in public at the movies, or a chill restaurant, and I was viewed as more than a new sexual experience—but I don’t think I was seen as potential relationship material either. We vibed well and there was sexual tension building during our dates. After a month, he reached out to me saying he couldn’t be with me because I am transgender.However, I recently went on a date with a guy who was tall, handsome, funny and had his shit (relatively) together. I responded saying it was all over my Ok Cupid profile, which it turns out he never read.We met in the late afternoon and enjoyed our frozen yogurt in perfect patio weather. At the end of the date, our first kiss quickly turned into a handsy make out session in the backseat of my car. He said, “I’m bouncing; that’s f-cked up,” and jumped out of the car, spat on the ground, slammed the car door and walked away.After realizing that I deserved so much better and was wasting my time with these guys, I stopped giving them attention.After one too many encounters with men who were fetishizing me, I started to spend time on guys who wanted to get to know me.Before it went further, I did my routine check of asking, “You know I’m right? I sat in the back seat of my car in complete shock.
As a trans woman on dating apps, I’ve always made sure that guys are aware that I am transgender. There have also been many documented cases of trans women being hurt and sometimes even killed when they disclose their status to transphobic men that found them attractive, so disclosing my status is also a way of protecting myself from potentially dangerous situations.I stayed in my back seat for probably five minutes to make sure he was gone.When I got back into the front seat to drive home, I still felt uneasy.Washboard-Abs-No-Face and unsolicited dick pics that most women, unfortunately, receive. Right as a transgender woman (I was born male, but identify and present as female) adds a whole new dimension to digital dating.Since transitioning in I haven’t reacted positively to guys who hit on me in person because I haven’t mastered the art of telling them that we have “the same parts.” For the past three years, Tinder has been my gateway into online dating as a transgender woman.
I get plenty of matches on Tinder, but within 24 hours around half of them un-match or block me after reading my profile.